I was moved by a new song this morning.  Well, it’s not really all that new.  It’s just new to me.

The song is “Oceans (Where Feet May Fail)” by Hillsong United off their 2013 album Zion.

The lyrics of this song are truly inspired. So, too, is the melody. I wish I’d known the song sooner. Many of these lyrics are sweet and moving, but I was especially touched by the bridge, which reduced me to a pool of tears:

Spirit lead me where my trust is without borders
Let me walk upon the waters
Wherever You would call me
Take me deeper than my feet could ever wander
And my faith will be made stronger
In the presence of my Savior

That first line called to me deeply. I long in my heart to trust.  To trust God’s plan, to trust my fellows on this earth, to trust that I am safe in God’s arms. The idea of trusting wholly, with my arms wide open, and without borders, inspires me. Being closed off to trust and love has been putting torque on my heart that I didn’t even recognize. It has been there so long that I have simply learned to live with it, and I normalized it. Even in the past, when I have trusted others, I believe that trust had limits. I am ashamed to admit that I probably only trusted when it was convenient, or easy. I don’t want to live that way anymore.

The second two lines together are a rejoiceful resignation to God’s will and a trustful faith. To say simply that I will go where called, and by my faith in his grace my feet will find purchase calls to mind the story of Peter and Jesus walking on the water:

“‘Lord, if it’s you,’ Peter replied, ‘tell me to come to you on the water.’
‘Come,’ he said.
Then Peter got down out of the boat, walked on the water and came toward Jesus. But when he saw the wind, he was afraid, and beginning to sink, cried out, ‘Lord, save me!”
Immediately Jesus reached out his hand and caught him…” (Matthew 14:28-31)

The story teaches me two things.  First, if I have faith and trust in the Lord, all things are possible. Secondly, I know that even though I am human and I will falter, the Lord will be there to grab hold of my hand should I waver.

I want very much to give such trust completely, both to the Lord and to my fellows.

This week has been a trial in my life, but it has also been a time of great joy and relief. I have found it in my heart to welcome God, and his son Jesus Christ, into my life. It was remarkably easy, as though I had been preparing for that moment my whole life, and I needed only to give myself over to His love. It came as though I had been drowning in the dark sea, and for the first time I broke the surface of the water to breathe. It came as though it was supposed to happen. It felt like something I should have known all along.

It felt as though it was God’s plan for me. I trust that.

This verse from Romans encompasses both how I feel at this moment, and how I want to feel every day for the rest of my life: “May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace as you trust in him, so that you may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit.” (Romans 15:13)

Prayer:

Heavenly Father, now is a time for deep trust. I ask that you guide me with your sovereign hand, and I know that as I lean on you, you will not falter.